Real Talk Everyday: Mental Health Matters with Family

-Sheersha Roy

Intern, Mind Splatters, May-July 2024

Mental health matters are discussed often in households, considering that it has affected an ‘other’ individual. What should then happen if we experience mental health challenges ourselves and become the person we used to talk about?

Here are 8 possible ways to share it with your loved ones, without relying on terminology and excessive vocabulary:

1. Starting with normalizing conversations in an active voice Everyone’s mental health journey does not begin by using words such as ‘depression’ or anxiety. Rather, as children, we share our daily experiences to communicate our challenges and thoughts. Sharing a personal story in everyday language can help in making this conversation familiar and develop a safe space to start with. Talking about your own experience with the help of “I”, and “My” is also important to be vocal and reach out for help.

2. Physical symptoms are also important! Discussing mental health does not mean that it is separate from physical health. Young children and the elderly often express their challenges in terms of their appetite, sleep, movement etc. These symptoms are important in the process of early detection and can give some cues to our loved ones for help.

3. Asking to Listen When we encounter a problem, it is natural for dear ones to fend for possible solutions. Sometimes, this can lead to a misdiagnosis or exacerbate existing issues. Instead, asking your family to support you is important in communicating your own needs.

4. Differentiate between popular media and actual life Representation of mental health on a large scale has increased awareness, yet has prompted certain notions to emerge. What we watch in the media is inspired by real life but not the same and can conflict with what is shared. So after watching every small content, engage in discussing the scope, source and various possibilities of the argument with your family members. This is a chance to get educated together in certain domains too.

5. Focus on specific feelings: Instead of using broad terms like anxiety, OCD, and depression, we could express using sentences that entail the feeling and the source behind the feeling. This increases the scope for the person in front to help and empathize, even in the absence of the vocabulary.

6. Tech to the rescue between generations: Social media platforms such as WhatsApp, Facebook and Instagram are used daily to educate each other and facilitate communication between different generations. We could use these platforms (such as Wysa)  to express as well and promote more inclusive language when doing so. This practice might also bring generations together to bridge the digital divide.

7. Be the safe space: As much as we would want to confide in someone about our mental health concerns, our loved ones would also want to find the same safety in us. It is important to take responsibility for maintaining confidentiality for even our close ones and listen when it is needed. Sometimes, being present is the most one can do too. Try creating a ‘safe word’ that hints at wanting support without having to explain.

8. Feedback: Along with educating together, it is important to ask each other about the ways we respond to each others’ mental health concerns. Discussing worldviews or past reactions can strengthen relationships and lead to a better understanding of individual needs. As a task, this is very new and acknowledging that can make it a little less daunting for both parties.